the ruminations of aaron eberline

So I have not really been reading my Bible as I would like lately. I can easily feel like I am a bad christian or lack motivation because I have been lacking motivation. I don’t feel bad at all because:

Then Jesus said to them, “You will all fall away because of Me this night, for it is written, ‘I will strike down the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock shall be scattered.’ But after I have been raised, I will go ahead of you to Galilee.”

– Matthew 26:31 NASB

Jesus restores! When I look at the disciples they scattered at the most terrifying moment in their relationship with Jesus. He was crucified and they worried about their safety and if they would be next. The disciples went back to what they knew and what they understood. Peter was a fisherman and went fishing. In John 21:4-17 you have a tender and wonderful story of the redemption of Peter. Out on the lake fishing Peter is busy fishing when Jesus speaks and instructs to cast their nets on the right of the boat where they finally caught fish. Peter unrestrained jumps from the boat into the sea to reach Jesus . Jesus feeds Peter and John breakfast and then tenderly Jesus asks Peter to tend the believers!

I am Peter right now! I have walked my own way and followed my own desires through my most recent stressful and difficult time. The more I found my self sitting and waiting for healing I became desperate for anything to occupy my time. I wanted to watch movies, play video games, and read fun books to help me deal with the the time of pain. I felt less compelled to read my Bible and I started to feel dry. God has helped me so much the last few days. I am starting to walk again and I am moving on in my healing. God is restoring me tenderly and there is no guilt. I thank God for the passionate times He gives me because they help me through the times when I have no passion and lack everything.

If you find yourself in a place where you feel like you are lacking passion God will not forget you and will restore you. Rest in Him and wait on Him.